my visit to the ER! 38 weeks pregnant..

last night around 8:30 the pain in my mouth/head got so bad that i had a major meltdown & panic attack and couldn't stop sobbing or even catch my breath. i called my midwife and she said "go to the medical clinic!" but none were open so i went to the ER.. hospitals are the LAST place in the world i will go.. i don't ever choose it, so this was pretty major for me... i wanted to go.
my dp took me while my mom put my 2 little ones to sleep (thank goddess for mothers!) as soon as the admitting nurse talked to me i burst into tears and she sat me down and took my BP which amazingly was lower than its been for my midwife since 25 weeks and she said "good!" (i have borderline high BP generally) my pulse was racing though..anyways..i calmed down and told her that i was 38 weeks pregnant and exhausted from no sleep for 5 nights and not being able to eat really anything and being in so much unbearable pain despite 3 full days on oral antibiotics and extra strength tylenol..then i waited, then they gave me a bracelet and took me down the hall to another waiting room full of puking and injured people. all i could do was sit with my eyes closed and rock in pain. finally a dr. came and took me to a bed and asked me what was going on and again i burst into tears (im such a dork) he looked my my mouth said "we can give you IV antibiotics and tylenol 3's or morphine pills but you have to see a dentist tomorrow!" so i went back and waited for the dr. and got the iv put in and got a huge dose of penicillin and some nasty green pills that im pretty sure were morphine because with about 15 minutes i was chatting and laughing with some guy with a shattered foot. it took a while for the iv drip to finish and the dr came back with some other pain meds for the night (t-3s..?!) and a prescription for tylenol 3's to fill today. all of this was done in a super uncomfy chair in a corner of their middle-of-a-reno ER ..after all of that my tummy was growling and i was totally thinking about eating KFC and ribs that i saw made on a cooking show earlier in the day while trying to distract myself (2 things i have never ever in my life eaten) and we were just hoping our car wasn't towed from the 15 minute parking lot that it had been in for the last 3 hours (it was 11:30 by the time we left the hospital) we finally got home and my stomach was in major pain from so much medication and no food, so i ate whole milk yogurt and a bagel with cream cheese and a glass of milk and it slowly went away..then i tried to sleep (im soOoOo tired) and to no avail. i was up all night again. not in pain.. i just could. not.sleep. i feel like a zombie..i read most of a trashy mystery novel staring china bales, ametuer detective and herb & tea shop owner and at about 3 am made some toast with nutritional yeast to drive away the gnawing hunger in my belly again.great night, huh?!
im not in any major pain and i have to go back again today for another dose of iv antibiotics (i had to keep the line in with this funky gauze handwarmer) so im just catching up here then going back to the hospital. i have a dentist appt. at 3 and then hopefully ill be on the road to normalcy again!!

oh and to top it off the hot water tank broke yesterday, so if i go into labour in the next few days..no water birth for us

*thank you baby for staying in and being so good and keeping me from jumping off a bridge in pain. i love you and can't wait to meet you!*

a little bit of home..

we are finally in the city to stay(at least for a few weeks) after months of being back and forth for midwife appointments..it's Christmas eve day and crisp and sunny and no snow to speak of, except up the montains that surround vancouver. i'm feeling a bit homesick for our snowy winter land and our cozy wood-warmed house.
i know that coming here to have the baby was the right choice, but there is nowhere like "home"
so here is a neat picture of our pretty little town, though not blanketed in winter (picture not taken by me..) to remind me that in a few weeks we will be back, and with our newest little one!!




and here are some pictures of our little wintery home taken just this past week..

a little bit of summer..

a friend took this picture of ngaio, finn (our pup) and i this past august.. i think its a sweet picture of us so i thought i'd share..

names..names..names...

i'm having such a hard time deciding on a name for this baby!
i have so many that i like, but they just don't really fit together in any cohesive way.

Both Elwynn (noam sage cornelius tucker) and Ngaio (amelia anne sapphyre) were easy to name.. i guess thats why this time i'm so stuck this time.

here are the names that i love, and that i want in her name...

Beatrix:bringer of happiness...latin/german
Olive: kind one, olive tree, peace..latin
Arubella: kind of made it up..
Zia: light, splendor, grain...Arabic/Latin

i also like the names; orynn, zinnia, sabine, annika, annishka, saskia, hazel, kyri....

*sigh* so many nice names..

a wrinkle in time..

i can't believe that my last post was almost 6 months ago.. we moved in the early summer to a small town of about 200 people. we are surrounded by rolling hills (or small mountains..) and the swift flowing north thompson river. we live on the cross roads of two highways, one heading up to the caribou and the other heading towards jasper and alberta..

we have a smallish house on a big piece of green. there are cows and horses just a stones throw away...but we are sorely lacking in internet access, except for the library and grama's house 30 minutes away, hence my lack of blogging.

summer was green and hot and full of swimming in the rivers and lakes..we spent a lot of sunny saturdays going to the farmers market in clearwater, just down the highway a ways, to buy fresh veggies and other fun goodies and we adopted a tiny puppy, whom we named finnegan.

Autumn came quickly and seemed to leave just as fast, but the colours of the trees and the autumn smells were lovely. Elwynn began school in september. he takes the school bus and loves it! Halloween was a clear cool night. there was a huge bonfire at the community hall and fireworks and goodies galore. elwynn was a cowboy and ngaio a very grumpy ladybug.

Now winter is here and we are awaiting the arrival of our newest family member. im 34 weeks along now. late december or early january will bring her earthside, and we are all very excited to finally meet her.

i've been knitting almost non stop since autumn blew in, so here are a few things to show for it!

its been a long long time

ngaio and the first radish of the season.. the bunnies enjoyed the greens!
and our wee garden with much life a bloom. there are carrots, beets, spinnach, beans, radishes, chives, lettuce and tomatoes growing..and thats only a teeny part of the garden. sadly we are moving saturday and leaving it all behind, but it will be enjoyed by my sister & family, so i'm happy that it will be loved and nibbled!

veggies of another kind.
i knit these for a craft swap. it was fun making corn and broccoli for the first time. i think that they turned out really well and i know the momma and kids love them!

missy ngaio being silly, as usual.

and last but not least elwynn aka batman!

hand painted yarn..peace fleece ..leg warmers and my hand dyed iceland

my prrdy red henna and ngaio at faeries&fools

here is my new hair colour.. i used persian red rainbow henna with ground cloves and paprika..
i love it! i wish that my hair was like this naturally! kinda a weird picture, sorry.. self portraits are hard. i want to get a picture in the sunshine because it just glows. its rad.

yesterday was faeries&fools and i totally forgot that i had my camera with be but for a few pictures of ngaio (so sad because there were some amazing costumes)..so here she is being a cute faerie baby

yesterday the local waldorf school held their annual mayfaire. we watched all of the flower laiden children dance and sing. it was a beautiful crisp day and everyone full of smiles.
elwynn and i watched a beautiful puppet show about a boy and his magical horse while ngaio and timothy played in the school grounds and then we spent the rest of the day in the city with my sister having a picnic and playing at the park.
a perfect spring day!

pictures of spring

strawberry shortcake picky pants

my very first sock!

im very pleassed with how this turned out. shocked at how easy socks are to knit and mad at myself that i havn't been knitting them all along!
they are from this pattern http://magknits.com/Aug06/patterns/Specialsocks.htm
but like usual, im too much of an anarchist to follow the pattern completely so i just used it for the dimensions and foot shaping..
i love long socks that work with rubber boots, so that is what i made.
im nearly done the second one and i have already picked out the yarn for my next pair.
they fit elwynn ( THE MODEL) and on ngaio they are a bit large, but im sure by next winter they will be perfect.
im addicted to socks now!

tattoo update!

i went in for another 5 hour session with matta yesterday.. she touched up and added colour to the first piece and outlined the next. there is still a lot to do, but its coming along!
i can't take a picture of the new part though because its a very weird angle, so i'll have to get timothy to take a few when he gets home. i really wanted to show what it would look like when its all done, so here is an idea. i love it. the colour just really brings it alive.

a day on antannies farm!